In a post shared on the U.K.-based discussion website Mumsnet, which can be seen here, user strivingtosucced explained that the couple had met three years ago and had become close friends before their relationship turned serious last year.

The couple are now considering getting married around November this year.

But the Mumsnet user, aged in their early 30s, said they had not yet moved in together and admitted that the marriage plan had caused some concern among their friends. “The few people I’ve told have mostly expressed concern about the speed we are moving at, though some are very excited for me. They think we’re not taking enough time to get to know each other romantically and are skipping some steps,” the poster said.

The Mumsnet poster concluded by asking: “So I’d like to know what you guys think? YABU (you are being unreasonable)—yes, you’re moving too fast, slow down and smell the roses YANBU (you are not being unreasonable)—older relationships don’t need years before deciding to tie the knot.”

Wedding expert and editor at Hitched Zoe Burke told Newsweek that while there is no “wrong” time to get married, living together would be preferable.

She added: “There’s no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ time to get married—it’s a hugely personal decision that will depend on your feelings, but it’s definitely one to give a lot of consideration to and to take seriously.

“If you’ve known someone for a while as a friend, it’s natural that your relationship may progress more quickly—as the poster points out, they have ‘cut a lot of introduction time’ out.”

She continued: “But I would still recommend living with someone first if you can and taking the time to ensure that you’re compatible as life partners, not just as friends, as getting married is a very big commitment.

“Even if you get engaged and set a date for a year ahead, that gives you time to enjoy another stage in your relationship, and all the excitement of planning a wedding, whilst still getting to really know each other.”

According to the marriage planning website Brides, couples are getting married later in life than they were 50 years ago. “Most couples date for two or more years before getting engaged with many dating between two to five years,” it said. Once engaged, the average length until the wedding is between 12 and 18 months, according to the website.

Since being shared on Wednesday, January 4, the post has attracted some 100 replies. Commenters were divided about what the best course of action would be.

Mumsnet user Tessaanderson said: “Your friends are much better positioned to comment on the rights and wrongs.

“My guess is that they have an uneasy feeling about it. They know you better than a bunch of strangers online. Maybe you are generally impulsive. Maybe he has history. Maybe they have a feeling he is using you. Maybe they have a feeling that you are not quite so compatible. Maybe they just feel it’s not something you should be hurrying and rushing into.

“At the end of the day, it’s your life and your happiness/risk but your friends don’t really have anything to gain by giving you negative advice so it should at least be taken on board.

“30 is not old and you have plenty of time to have a great life together. It is old enough to make a terrible decision that affects you for a long time though.”

DarkKarmalLama added: “You actually don’t know him that well if you’ve never lived with him.”